I am lucky to have you, babs.
So here is my favorite photo of us this month. This was taken during my 23rd birthday which I was to blame why it isn't a special day for me. I ruined that good bond we have just because I went out for a coffee with a friend. Even though you said you have already forgave me, I will still carry in my heart how sorry I was. No psychological reasons could justify my misbehavior.
But, I am not writing this post to go back on how bad we had to go through these past few weeks. I am writing this to tell the world that I am lucky.. no, not lucky but blessed to have you. I am blessed that you existed and pursued in my life. You know how messed up I can be yet you still gave the third chance to make it through with my doings. I can feel that you love me more than you love yourself. Thank you for loving me, babs. You are always the best.
I may have friends (most especially on the opposite sex) whom I become so clingy and friendly, always remember that they are just my friends. But you, you are my boyfriend and I am proud telling them that I have a boyfriend and I love him [you] . I apologize that I have gone overboard on my friendliness which may have considered by some as flirting. Because of what happened, I have to limit myself. I have to remind myself that some things are not okay most especially the reason is that I already have you.
If you feel paranoia is bugging you, remember the day I impulsively decided to take a bus home and meet you to personally say sorry. It's like I was in a race and I have no other time to get hold of the trophy, so no matter whatever obstacles I have to encounter, I have to get through to it. I have to see you because if not, I might lose you. I can't afford to live a life without you. You've been my other half and I want you to be my forever half.
If you're hurting, I am hurting more. I am hurt how stupid I am to make my love cry just because of my mischievous doing. And this hurt, I shall forever carry in my heart because it was one of those worst days of my life.
I love you babs. I really do. No matter what other people say, no matter what other people tell me what to do, I would always choose you. There may be things I can't tell you or I am having hard time telling you, what really wraps up everything is that I love you.
Thank you for the trust you gave me, love. Thank you for another chance. Thank you for staying. I am really lucky to have you.